


Rewind Wishes

by Hakaysha



Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Time Loop, Time Skips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-28
Updated: 2015-03-28
Packaged: 2018-03-20 00:03:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3629196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hakaysha/pseuds/Hakaysha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She wishes for powers she doesn't have until she wishes no one had them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rewind Wishes

**Author's Note:**

> Kind of an one-shot angsty ramble. Hope the game doesn't actually ends like this... :|  
> Probably too confusing but oh well matches the game

It’s the end of the world out there.

Can you feel the warmth of my embrace and the fire consuming the city?

There’s a pool of tears by your feet. Red tears, your blood.

And I know that in fact you can’t feel anything.

It’s the end out there, so allow me to get back to the beginning.

 

**[Rewind life]**

It started with the lady-bug on your hair, we were lying down on the grass and it climbed on you, I shooed it away, you screamed, I laughed and then we laughed together and in my childish mind everything was right forever.

When I stopped laughing all of a sudden, you asked me if everything was alright but I didn't have the heart, or maybe I had too much heart already, to tell you the truth, so I just looked concerned and whispered "maybe now you have the lady-bug disease and you'll wake up tomorrow as a grown up proper lady".

You screamed again and ran inside to ask your parents if it was a real disease. And I laughed as I watched you go, a premonition of years to come, except I wouldn't be laughing then.

 

**[Forward some years]**

And we weren’t children anymore.

We were in school and felt so grown up and important. You helped me with homework, I helped you get in trouble, but we still held hands while going home and we still cuddled closer on our horror movies sleepovers.

\- What if there's a real serial killer hiding here in Arcadia? - You would ask with your deer in headlights eyes

\- What if it's me and my murder weapon is tickles? - and I would tickle you until we both were gasping for air. The horror movie was forgotten and the horror was in me because I knew that someday I would have to share you and your laughter.

 

**[Forward some more years]**

I was watching you go like the summer of our childhood had promised.

I had hugged you one last time and tasted your tears mixing with mine. I wished I had some kind of mystical power to make you come back - I pictured your parents’ van rewinding through the street, you wouldn’t be leaving, and I would be hugging you while silently begging you to stay with a kiss.

But I just watched you go. A horizon of unspoken wishes.

 

**[F some months]**

 

I'm dressed all in black and I can't feel the cold of the cemetery. My dad died and I want to cry but the tears are stuck somewhere inside my head, "you just need a friendly shoulder to cry in and let go" - says some unnamed aunt.

There's a swirl of memories and I'm reminded my shelters are gone, first you and now my father.

And suddenly I can feel the cold crawling inside my skin right to my bones. I shiver and I remember that somehow that meant someone is thinking of you. Are you thinking of me? Do your new friends protect you from lady-bugs and boring homework and horror movies?  
Can you come and protect me for a chance?

 

**[F some years]**

 

I met her in the Arcadia beach, afternoon shining on her hair and the waves of attraction hit me like they will hit this beach on a distant future storm.

She smiled and I smiled along because I saw happy days coming. And happy they were.

I forgot about you for a while. At least I didn’t have to worry about the letters I couldn’t send because you didn’t even told me your address, regardless of knowing mine by heart.

Do you know what I also knew by heart? My angel’s soft laugh when we watched horror movies and she wasn’t afraid.

 

**[F]**

I dyed my hair bright blue again. She said she liked it, that it made me look like the exotic blue bird that didn’t belong to this hellish city.

Except this time she wasn’t here to caress it and I was once again alone.  
I wrote you a letter, like I hadn’t done in years, I said all the truths I hid in your hair when we feel asleep next to each other. But once again I couldn’t send it anywhere, so I sent it to the beach, folded into a tiny boat – at least something can leave this place.

**[f]**

 

You came back and apparently saved my life. Who would have guessed?

I wanna hug you and laugh but we’re running away from something, except I can’t guess what and you’re not the same Max that I watched go away. Oh you still have those doe eyes and I still want to get lost in them, but you’re hiding behind your camera, so I dance for you because I can’t dance with you.

There’s a mystery in you with that newfound strange power and karma is a bitch because I remember wishing for it so many memories ago.

I wonder how many of your mistakes have you corrected. Did you correct that mistake where I told you that I loved you? Did you correct that mistake where I kissed you? I guess not because I’m holding your hand like we did before and you’re not rewinding time just for once.

I wish I could have that power to undo so many things…

 

**[F] [F] [F]**

 

Please undo this mistake. Please turn back time and make my hateful words return to my twisted heart.

I did mean them but I never meant for you to hear them. Blame years of unsent letters.

Or maybe I’m just jealous you can rewind so much, but never rewinded leaving me here stranded and bitter.

And as I watch you cry, I wish you never rewinded the bullet that would have killed me. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to blame you for all the mistakes I could never fix.

Your soft heart betrayed me as you hugged me and protected me from myself. I whispered words of regret and felt them tumbling from my mouth as fast as my tears. You hugged me even tighter and fixed everything, not by turning back time, but by smiling and saying “It’s okay, I love you too”.

 

**[FFF]**

 

There’s something wrong.

There’s something so wrong.

The city feels heavy with anticipation. And we shudder not knowing what is coming.

Except you do and you wake up startled and your headaches are killing you, you say.

I want to protect you but I don’t know how.

We ran to the lighthouse after my stepfather lashed out at you out of rage for whatever reason he saw fitting at the moment. No matter how many times he did the same to me I wouldn’t allow that to happen to you so I took out the gun I stole, pointed it at him, took your hand and ran away with you. Away from there, away from another of my mistakes. And I wished, for what it felt like the hundredth time, that we could run so far away from here.

 

**[FFF^fff]**

 

You’re so quiet – a disturbing contrast from all the noise coming from the storm raging outside.

We both know Arcadia is being torn apart by the sudden tornado. “Not so sudden” - you say with hollow eyes - “it’s my fault, it started with me playing with time.”

I almost whisper that time was always my enemy, so little time with you, so little time with Rachel, not nearly enough time to caress your face with my lips.

You get up and kiss me, and if I knew this would be our last, I would have enjoyed it more, I would have frozen the cruel time.

I recognize you trying to bend time, of course I try to stop you, of course I know it will hurt you, like it has been for a while, but once again I don’t reach you in _time_ and you start bleeding from your nose and I’m holding you in my arms and you're screaming louder than I can hear the city falling to pieces.

If I could bend time like you do I would make that lady-bug stay in place, maybe it was its wings that started this horrifying storm (in my heart).

You’re shaking and bleeding and still trying to rewind my mistakes once again. I wish I never wished for anything.

I wish you were okay and not fixing **time**.

 

**[Rewind time]**

It’s the end of the world out there.

Can you feel the warmth of my embrace and the fire consuming my heart?

There’s a pool of tears by your feet. Red tears, your blood.

And I know that in fact you can’t feel anything.

It’s the end out here cause I rewinded so much I reached my first rewind – the time I saw you after so many years that I couldn’t recognize the girl who protected me, who made me laugh, who I tried to forget so deeply because of all the pain of leaving you. – the time I saw you die and I couldn’t save you because I had no mystical power and I felt you fade away, like I saw you fade away in the back window of my car, like I saw you fade away every time I fell asleep in your arms.

“Max! You answered my letters...” – you whispered. I wish I could have read them. I wish you could have kissed me and felt the short, oh so short, time I know in my heart occurred in an unseen un-happened future.

I wish for your wishes wishing me.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. comments are always appreciated :)


End file.
